68

I have decided that I am not a good blogger becasue I attempt to blog a number of times before I actually post something. But I am determined to this time.
Well Summer Missions training is this weekend so I figured I'd have a lot to say and avoid the rest of my life.
But I am attempting to be the first double emphasis edu. music major ever at MC. Meaning I would have one degree with two complete emphasis-voice and trumpet.
God speaks to me in the wierdest ways through people I would NEVER expect.
For voice it was a girl who I took her 'job' of leading worship-I mean she's my friends but it's one of those friendships you catch up when you can-never thought God would use her to dramatically change my view on my voice.
For trumpet it is this guy in my music classes-he will never know it was because of him that made me ponder what the heck I was doing-but yea.
Crazy stuff.
So now I am going to take 17 hours of music classes-no core-I am BEYOND EXCITED!
This is reaffirming how much I love this. After almost one whole year of intense music courses and I still am madly in love-in fact more than I was before in love with the concept of doing this for my life-I mean come on-
PRAISE TO THE LORD!
I will be in school 5 1/2 years with 2 summers here-so Canada is essentially my last fun summer.
Which is just incredibly wierd. I am so glad I get to spend it serving my Savior.
My computer crashed this week, but I am ever so grateful for my family and how able we are to get me another one-so now I have a new computer :)
And my dad surprised me and got me a LEGIT keyboard-I am beyond words-I am not even a piano major so now I never have to leave my room to practice for piano and voice.
Thankful doesn't even begin to describe it.
Why do I get to grow up in a culture-a family that yes-broken. But so very blessed beyond measure. When children in Afria, China, or Haiti would do anything to have anything I do and appreciate it way more than I ever can. Not to question God-but that is something I intensely struggle with-is maybe the validity of God-and just 'why'-as if I am a 5 year old. I want to put God in a box-and He is not boxable-He is GOD. Child-likeness is good up to a point, and I am for sure surpassing that point.
My best friend Michelle and my twin/other best friend Becca come back from London in a week and a half and I could not be anymore excited. I miss them more and more the closer it comes to them coming back.
Oh and MC Singers has been gone all week so I have done NOTHING all week basically-so next week is sure going to suck haha-but it's been a spring break two-reality is going to HIT.
HARD.

91

So the past month I have literally tried to blog 3 or 4 times and failed but here I am sitting here deciding to post.
I am now at 91 days until I go live in Canada for 2 months. It feels like yesterday I was finding out and feeling so lost. Now I KNOW this is what I am supposed to do and because of how sovereign the Lord is I am not nervous but ready to go.
I think I fall in love with my major more and more but yet despise it more and more daily. However this is reassurance that it IS what I am supposed to do. I have never once questioned changing because of the way it came about-which is what God knew I needed.
However now I am at a place of pondering what to do in music-I know music is it- I am staying vocal education but I just don't know if I can justify within my self giving up 8 years of pouring over being the best (second best) trumpet player in Mississippi. How could I give this up? So, alas, I am seriously praying about throwing that back into the picture and I get a feeling of excitement!
My bestie since 5th grade and another best friend are in London and come back in 32 days! I am SO ready for them to be immersed back into my life and into the MC bubble. I know they are not but we here are. I miss Michelle and Becca extremely but Jesus provided for me 2 key people to enter my life as they left and I have now gained 2 bridesmaids in my wedding pretty much (that I am alopeing for Michelle ;) ).
Mary Catherine and Jen are literally a God-sent. We are all SO different but are all striving to serve the Lord so we love each other. We made an 'honesty' policy which was probably the hardest commitment I have ever had to make. Don't get me wrong. I am honest-but this goes way deeper than 'does this skirt look good on me?'. This honesty pact involves the hard questions of life and everything in between. I know I can go to these girls with quite literally anything and know I am not being judged. I have never been called out so much in my life it's ridiculous-but the amount of how much I've grown is amazing.
I encountered a new way to pray for lost people in my life from Mel-seeing there are quite a few. It's not that I've been praying wrong-it's just not what Jesus wanted me to see. Ya see some people in my life are not going to just 'realize' their need for Jesus. Something is going to have to happen-something horrific-which none of us want for those whom we love. But if it is at the price of knowing Jesus then I need to be ok with it. So now it's not just 'God take the veil off their eyes to see you', but it's 'God take the veil off their eyes in YOUR timing according to YOUR will whatever the price'. Hardest. Prayer. Ever.
I'm in my 20's now.
WHOA.
I have the COOLEST friends EVER who decorated my room and left me 20 encouraging notes of how much they love me. It literally meant the world to me.
This is a random blog and I almost didn't post it but I figured it would be fun to look back on years from now.